I always knew I wanted to be a mom, yet I never had the biological-clock-ticking-thing. One day, my husband and I looked at each other and asked ourselves the question, do we really want to add an unknown element to what we are having? And we closed our eyes and projected ourselves 10 years into the future. We both felt we weren’t alone anymore. Then I asked myself the question if I could say yes, unequivocally, to whatever would happen, including every joy and sorrow I could imagine, from an easy conception to no conception, from a great life to a possible death. And without any fear, expecting the best, whatever that may be, I said yes.
7 years ago, after an easy pregnancy, my daughter was born. There was no pink cloud, but from the moment she was born, I was confident. I knew how to be a mom and trusted that inner-voice completely. Although, I was a mom instantly, it took some days to bond to this tiny bundle of life. I did not worry about not feeling smitten, I just assumed all would be well. And on day four, looking into her eyes, there it was, a love that was different from anything I had experienced before, and it filled me completely. In that moment, I felt the depth of my ‘yes’ and knew this was a sacred bond. I knew I had invited her into my life and she had answered my calling. Now I had to step up to the plate. To me, there is nothing ‘normal’ about being a parent, it is not something you become in the logical order of things, nor is it not a ‘right’. Being a parent is a privilege and an honor, because there is nothing ‘normal’ about that tiny bundle of life, it is unique, there has never been a human being like it and there never will be, a speck of potential and it is entrusted to our care.
I want to honor my ‘yes’. I want my daughter to feel safe. I want her to feel confident, because she knows she is cared for. I want her choices to be rooted in Love, not because fear is absent, but because Love is rooted more strongly in her. Above all, I want her to know how to stay true to herself, remain centered and feel great. The greatest challenge as a parent is to know what Love looks like in each moment, and, even more, to not get in the way. Fortunately, I have a great teacher. She is only seven years old, but I couldn’t wish for a better mentor. I am a lucky mom to have such an awesome daughter.