How I got my act together

Understanding I’m responsible for my life and claiming that responsibility has been a cathartic experience for me. I remember being very reluctant at first, as it meant I was responsible for the mess in my life. I had been an expert in blaming it on outside circumstances. Every job interview that did not lead to a job was because they wouldn’t look beyond my resume and because there were always people with more experience. It took some time for me to be able to admit I had created that mess. It had not been my intention. I had not been aware of what I had been doing.  But I had created it nonetheless. It took courage to admit that I had not gotten the job, because I had believed upfront I would not get the job anyway and therefore had not been able to convince them that I would be a great asset to their company. It took strength not to grieve over all those lost years and blame it on my past, but to forgive myself and move forward on this new road. I have learned that being fully responsible for my life not only gives a sense of control, but most importantly it expands my life by creating opportunities that weren’t there before.